031: Holes // POEM

I have people shaped holes in my heart,

One, where only you’d fit.

These holes are always with me

Though sometimes, I forget.

I’ll be going about my day

When suddenly it hits.

A memory so vivid strikes

Heavy in how it sits.

Where once the smell of cedar

Would make me think of you,

It now just makes me sad for

All the things we’ll never do.

Because these you shaped holes

Will remain, forever empty.

I fill them with memories of us

And the things we could not be.

The truth is, those you shaped holes

Aren’t the only things I fear.

It’s more the sense of failure

Than the fact that you’re not here.

Because the fact you left like that

Was the least surprising part.

That emptiness you left me with

is not what destroyed my heart.

What began as a simple you shaped hole

morphed into a self doubt.

So when I fall deep in these holes

I fear I’ll never come back out.

I remind myself of my power

in those moments of despair.

because growth comes from resistance

And that we’ll always share.

Although these people shaped holes

Will always remain unfilled.

I can be proud of how I overcame

The you shaped hole you instilled.